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The Crooked Cargo

Two ships. Two impossible deliveries. Absolutely no margin for error.

by Simon Haynes ...

Series Book 11 - Hal Spacejock
"Spacejock's Law": The best way to hide one problem is to create three new ones.Hal is convinced his latest customer is yanking his chain, so he dumps their cargo and looks for a better deal.Then he discovers who the customer was.Now an angry passenger he sealed below decks is kicking in the lift doors, he has four hours to deliver that original cargo before hitmen rearrange his anatomy, and his ... Read more

$6.99 CAD

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"Spacejock's Law": The best way to hide one problem is to create three new ones.Hal is convinced his latest customer is yanking his chain, so he dumps their cargo and looks for a better deal.Then he discovers who the customer was.Now an angry passenger he sealed below decks is kicking in the lift doors, he has four hours to deliver that original cargo before hitmen rearrange his anatomy, and his
... Read more
The Wondrous Adventures of Sheerluck Hermes

Two parody short stories

by Simon Haynes ...

Meet Sheerluck Hermes, the world's greatest detective.Or so he says.With his trusty companion Wutson at his side, Hermes tackles baffling crimes, mysterious clients and cases that require all the powers of his extraordinary intellect.Unfortunately, his methods are unconventional, his deductions are questionable, and Wutson has learned that the safest place to be is usually several feet away ... Read more

$0.99 CAD or Free with Kobo Plus

Meet Sheerluck Hermes, the world's greatest detective.Or so he says.With his trusty companion Wutson at his side, Hermes tackles baffling crimes, mysterious clients and cases that require all the powers of his extraordinary intellect.Unfortunately, his methods are unconventional, his deductions are questionable, and Wutson has learned that the safest place to be is usually several feet away
... Read more
Driscoll Gorge

A cozy outback short story

by Simon Haynes ...

A quiet Outback town. A group of stranded tourists. A past that refuses to stay buried.When a tour bus driver's drinking threatens the safety of his passengers, local shopkeeper Mal steps in.Left stranded in the sweltering heat, the group of city tourists has nowhere to turn—until Mal begrudgingly offers to take them sightseeing to remote Driscoll Gorge in his own van.Mal is a man of few words, ... Read more

$0.99 CAD or Free with Kobo Plus

A quiet Outback town. A group of stranded tourists. A past that refuses to stay buried.When a tour bus driver's drinking threatens the safety of his passengers, local shopkeeper Mal steps in.Left stranded in the sweltering heat, the group of city tourists has nowhere to turn—until Mal begrudgingly offers to take them sightseeing to remote Driscoll Gorge in his own van.Mal is a man of few words,
... Read more
Mind over Matter

A retro scifi horror story

by Simon Haynes ...

Albert Simpson hates adverts.When Rex Corporation shows him a banner ad for their Brain Control Interface, he blocks it and gets on with his life.Unfortunately, the company isn't taking no for an answer.Three days later, a BCI headset arrives. There's no manual, the hardware looks homemade, and the software seems determined to install itself.A darkly comic retro science fiction short story about ... Read more

$0.99 CAD or Free with Kobo Plus

Albert Simpson hates adverts.When Rex Corporation shows him a banner ad for their Brain Control Interface, he blocks it and gets on with his life.Unfortunately, the company isn't taking no for an answer.Three days later, a BCI headset arrives. There's no manual, the hardware looks homemade, and the software seems determined to install itself.A darkly comic retro science fiction short story about
... Read more
Ooloowoo

A thought-provoking scifi short

by Simon Haynes ...

Aliens want the Earth's resources and their offer is immense.But will we accept the deal? ... Read more

$0.99 CAD or Free with Kobo Plus

Aliens want the Earth's resources and their offer is immense.But will we accept the deal?
... Read more
Collect One-Two

A dozen SF and Fantasy short stories

by Simon Haynes ...

Earth’s first colony ship heads for the stars ... and the crew discovers nothing is as it seems.A fearsome dragon terrorises a lonely village ... and three oddball heroes do their best to help out.A farm boy magicks his very own talking book ... and uses it to get laid.Collect One Two contains a dozen entertaining stories by Simon Haynes. These wide-ranging tales leap from mythical lands to the ... Read more

$4.99 CAD or Free with Kobo Plus

Earth’s first colony ship heads for the stars ... and the crew discovers nothing is as it seems.A fearsome dragon terrorises a lonely village ... and three oddball heroes do their best to help out.A farm boy magicks his very own talking book ... and uses it to get laid.Collect One Two contains a dozen entertaining stories by Simon Haynes. These wide-ranging tales leap from mythical lands to the
... Read more
Hal Spacejock: Visit

A short story

by Simon Haynes ...

Series series Hal Spacejock
Who thought it was a good idea to let Hal Spacejock inspire the next generation of spacefarers?Clunk has arranged a school visit, and Hal only agrees after he learns about the free lunch.All he has to do is give a speech, hand out a few gifts and admire a project the students have been working on.Simple.Unfortunately, Hal's speech has been neutered, his gifts are about as welcome as detention, and ... Read more

$0.99 CAD or Free with Kobo Plus

Who thought it was a good idea to let Hal Spacejock inspire the next generation of spacefarers?Clunk has arranged a school visit, and Hal only agrees after he learns about the free lunch.All he has to do is give a speech, hand out a few gifts and admire a project the students have been working on.Simple.Unfortunately, Hal's speech has been neutered, his gifts are about as welcome as detention, and
... Read more
Updown

A short story

by Simon Haynes ...

Social services call on ten-year-old Daniel, intending to take him away from his home and his mother.Danny has other ideas.A gripping science fiction tale with a twist! ... Read more

$0.99 CAD or Free with Kobo Plus

Social services call on ten-year-old Daniel, intending to take him away from his home and his mother.Danny has other ideas.A gripping science fiction tale with a twist!
... Read more
Yard Fail

A short story

by Simon Haynes ...

Ralph Swindon has just invented a new way to dispose of rubbish, but he can't turn it off.As the mysterious contraption starts swallowing everything in its path, Ralph and his reluctant helper are faced with a choice: run for their lives, or fix the rogue device before there's nothing left to run from.A 2,500-word comic science-fiction short story. ... Read more

$0.99 CAD or Free with Kobo Plus

Ralph Swindon has just invented a new way to dispose of rubbish, but he can't turn it off.As the mysterious contraption starts swallowing everything in its path, Ralph and his reluctant helper are faced with a choice: run for their lives, or fix the rogue device before there's nothing left to run from.A 2,500-word comic science-fiction short story.
... Read more
Thonn!

A short story

by Simon Haynes ...

In Thonn's world, Magick has been banned by politicians. Evil, corrupt and twisted ... and people didn't think much of the Magick either.So imagine Thonn's surprise when he spies Eddie de Elder attempting Magick spells inside his remote cottage!Of course, not just anyone can perform Magick, but Thonn is a simple farm boy and as we all know, they're the ones with the hidden talents ... ... Read more

$0.99 CAD or Free with Kobo Plus

In Thonn's world, Magick has been banned by politicians. Evil, corrupt and twisted ... and people didn't think much of the Magick either.So imagine Thonn's surprise when he spies Eddie de Elder attempting Magick spells inside his remote cottage!Of course, not just anyone can perform Magick, but Thonn is a simple farm boy and as we all know, they're the ones with the hidden talents ...
... Read more
Sleight of Hand

A short story

by Simon Haynes ...

Winner of the Aurealis Award for Best Horror Short StoryRalph Swindon has invented a way to send physical objects by email, and it works beautifully... until his friend sticks his hand into the machine and they transmit the wrong kind of digits.Now they must knuckle down and find a solution to this nail-biting problem.A 2,000-word horror short story with a darkly comic edge. ... Read more

$0.99 CAD or Free with Kobo Plus

Winner of the Aurealis Award for Best Horror Short StoryRalph Swindon has invented a way to send physical objects by email, and it works beautifully... until his friend sticks his hand into the machine and they transmit the wrong kind of digits.Now they must knuckle down and find a solution to this nail-biting problem.A 2,000-word horror short story with a darkly comic edge.
... Read more
Hal Spacejock Omnibus Two

by Simon Haynes ...

Series series Hal Spacejock
Three complete novels. One bonus short story. Infinite cosmic chaos.If you love absurd, witty sci-fi, strap in for Hal Spacejock Omnibus Two (Books 4–6 plus bonus content). Join bumbling freighter pilot Hal Spacejock and his long-suffering robotic companion, Clunk, as they navigate dodgy contracts, lethal rivalries, and catastrophic bad luck across the galaxy.What’s Inside the Bundle:Book 4: No ... Read more

$11.99 CAD or Free with Kobo Plus

Three complete novels. One bonus short story. Infinite cosmic chaos.If you love absurd, witty sci-fi, strap in for Hal Spacejock Omnibus Two (Books 4–6 plus bonus content). Join bumbling freighter pilot Hal Spacejock and his long-suffering robotic companion, Clunk, as they navigate dodgy contracts, lethal rivalries, and catastrophic bad luck across the galaxy.What’s Inside the Bundle:Book 4: No
... Read more

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Top Series in Canada

Hal Spacejock

Harriet Walsh

The Secret War

Dragon and Chips

Mysteries in Metal

Hal Junior

Communicating Gender

The Crooked Cargo

The Wondrous Adventures of Sheerluck Hermes

Driscoll Gorge

Mind over Matter

Ooloowoo

Collect One-Two

Hal Spacejock: Visit

Updown

Yard Fail

Thonn!

Sleight of Hand

Hal Spacejock Omnibus Two

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Top Series in Canada

Hal Spacejock

Harriet Walsh

The Secret War

Dragon and Chips

Mysteries in Metal

Hal Junior

Communicating Gender

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